I order mine with Freedom Fries. They use the sweat from the soldiers protecting our freedom to season them and give them their unique salt taste
Rack Me!
Actually, they don't use my sweat. They use something else that I have been told tastes salty. Oh and one last thing,
FUCK YOU RICARDO!!! FUCK YOU CHEERO!!! FUCK YOUR GAY ASS FAKE FUCKING GRANDFATHER, WHO SUPPOSABLE WAS IN THE FRENCH ARMY!!!!! THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS THE FRENCH ARMY OR WE WOULDN'T HAVE HAD TO COME BAIL YOU FUCKS OUT WHEN YOU GOT INVADED IN WWII.
And if you think I am lieing here is some history:
Brief History of France at War
An unofficial synopsis
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Gallic Wars - Lost
In a war whose ending foreshadows the next 2000 years of French history, France is conquered by of all things, an Italian.
Hundred Years War - Mostly lost
Saved at last by female schizophrenic who inadvertently creates The First Rule of French Warfare: "France's armies are victorious only when not led by a Frenchman."
Italian Wars - Lost
France becomes the first and only country to ever lose two wars when fighting Italians.
Wars of Religion
France goes 0-5-4 against the Huguenots.
Thirty Years War
France is technically not a participant, but manages to get invaded anyway. Claims a tie on the basis that eventually the other participants started ignoring her.
War of Devolution - Tied
Frenchmen take to wearing red flowerpots as chapeaux.
The Dutch War - Tied
War of the Augsburg League/King William's War/French and Indian War - Lost...
but claimed as a tie. Three ties in a row induces deluded Frogophiles the world over to label the period as the height of French military power.
War of the Spanish Succession - Lost
The War also gave the French their first taste of a Marlborough, which they have loved ever since.
American Revolution
In a move that will become quite familiar to future Americans, France claims a win even though the colonists saw far more action. This is later known as "de Gaulle Syndrome", and leads to the Second Rule of French Warfare: "France only wins when America does most of the fighting."
French Revolution - Won
Primarily due the fact that the opponent was also French.
The Napoleonic Wars - Lost
Temporary victories (remember the First Rule!) due to leadership of a Corsican, who ended up being no match for a British footwear designer.
The Franco-Prussian War - Lost
Germany first plays the role of drunk frat boy to France's ugly girl home alone on a Saturday night.
World War I - Tied...
and on the way to losing, France is saved by the United States.
World War II - Lost
Conquered French liberated by the United States and Britain just as they finish learning the Horst Wessel Song.
War in Indochina - Lost
French forces plead sickness, take to bed with the Dien Bien Flu.
Algerian Rebellion - Lost
Loss marks the first defeat of a western army by a Non-Turkic Muslim force since the Crusades, and produces the First Rule of Muslim Warfare: "We can always beat the French." This rule is identical to the First Rules of the Italians, Russians, Germans, English, Dutch, Spanish, Vietnamese, and Esquimaux.
1991 Gulf War - Won
Refer to Second Rule of French Warfare: "France only wins when America does most of the fighting."
War on Terrorism - France
Keeping in mind its recent history, surrenders to Germans and Muslims just to be safe. Attempts to surrender to Vietnamese ambassador fail after he takes refuge in a McDonald's.
FINAL TALLY: Won = 3; Lost = 10; Tied = 5.
Now, do we REALLY want them on our side?
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